3 Things Your Pre-Teen Son Wants You to Know – Interview with Michael Ross (Part 1)
Laurie Christine
Laurie Christine
June 30, 2021
pre-teen son


I don’t know about you, but the thought of having teenage boys (currently a pre-teen son) in my house in a few years is a little bit scary. How can we moms help to prepare our sons to transition into their teenage years? What do our boys need from us?  

We have a special guest today to help us answer some of these questions. We’re going to talk about 3 messages our teenage sons need us to hear.

Welcome to Episode 27 of Redeeming the Chaos with Laurie Christine.


Our special guest today is Michael Ross. Michael Ross is an award-winning author and former editor of BREAKAWAY, a national magazine for teen guys published by Focus on the Family. Several of his books include BOOM: A GUY’S GUIDE TO GROWING UP, WHAT YOUR SON ISN’T TELLING YOU, and an unofficial Minecraft guide BUILDING FAITH BLOCK BY BLOCK. Michael and his wife Tiffany live near St. Louis, Missouri, with their son Christopher. (Affiliate links)

This is part one of a two part episode in which Michael and I talk about how we as moms can be intentional about connecting with our sons during their teenage years.

You can listen to my interview with Michael here: 

Here is an overview of what Michael and I discussed.


There are three universal longings or messages that your pre-teen / teen boy wants you to know and understand. In addition, there are three “essential relational links” that will help you connect with your son during this time of transition.

MESSAGE #1 – I’m not you.

  • It’s important to be able to step into your son’s shoes, listen to what he is thinking and learn what he is feeling. Give your son space to grow into his own self and develop his own unique personality. 
  • Try to imagine some of the pressures your son is facing and the issues that he has to deal with. 
  • Relational Link: Empathy 

MESSAGE #2 – Trust me as I trust you.

  • Give your son opportunities to prove his trustworthiness as he is given greater responsibilities
  • Model the same kind of behavior you want your son to exhibit – make sure he can trust you to do what you say and live a life of integrity
  • Relational Link: Trust

MESSAGE #3 – Stay close to me AND let me breathe

  • Be intentional about spending time with your son, even if they resist
  • At the same time, give your son space to be himself
  • Your teen / tween boy is looking for boundaries – he wants to know you care enough about him to keep him safe. But at the same time, he wants you to trust him with greater responsibilities and privileges.
  • Relational Link – Consistent and balanced connection


I hope you were encouraged today by my conversation with Michael Ross. Please join me again next week as we finish our discussion. We’ll be talking about mistakes moms make with their teenage or pre-teen sons, how to nurture your son’s relationship with the Lord, and how can we moms guard and prepare our hearts as our boys start to pull away from us.

You can learn more about Michael Ross and purchase some of his books on his Amazon page. Be sure to check out Michael’s book “What Your Son Isn’t Telling You” as well as his unofficial minecraft devotional – “Building Faith Block by Block.”  (Affiliate links). You can also connect with Michael on his Facebook page – Michael Ross Books


Just a reminder, we are a few weeks into our Summer Family Fruit Challenge. Did you sign up yet?  It’s not too late!  Go to to sign up. You will receive an email every Monday morning through the rest of the summer that will help you teach your kids about the Fruit of the Spirit. Each week of the challenge includes a short devotional about one of the fruits of the Spirit, printable Bible memory cards, and links to songs, games and activities that will help your kids develop godly character qualities.  You can learn all about it at

Also, I would love to invite you to join me in our Facebook group.  It’s called “Raising Courageous Boys,” and it’s a place for Christian boy moms to connect and encourage each other on this wild, wonderful, chaotic adventure of raising boys. 

Thank you so much for joining me for Episode 27 of Redeeming the Chaos with Laurie Christine.


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New Devotional Book for Boys

Michael never expected his comrade, Lucifer, to rebel against the King of Heaven, let alone turn into a dragon. But Lucifer will stop at nothing in an attempt to overpower the throne.

Can Michael and his army of angels defeat the enemy or will Lucifer’s evil plan succeed?

confident prayers

“Be strong and courageous, for the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”



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