Parenting Tool: Visioning
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Hey there, Momma!
It sounds like VISIONING might be the best heart-based parenting tool to use with your son right now.
You want to connect with your son’s heart, but you’re not sure how. The tool of visioning will help give your son perspective and allow you to connect with him on a deeper level.
Below you will find some practical tips on how to use visioning to help give your son some perspective.
This is just one of the 7 heart-based parenting tools. Check your inbox over the next few days and weeks for more practical tools you can use to connect with your son’s heart.
Your first email should be in your inbox now! (Be sure to check your updates folder). This email explain what it means to parent from a heart-based approach.
Heart-Based Parenting Tool: Visioning
The tool of visioning will give your son perspective. It will help him focus on what could be, rather than only focusing on what is right now. It gives him a character goal to work toward together with you.
What does visioning look like?
1). First have a meeting with your son. Make it positive. Tell him about strengths you see in him.
“God has made you strong and determined. I love that about you. My prayer is that God will use those gifts for his glory.”
2). Next, talk about an area you’d like to work on with him. Choose one character quality to start with. Explain why it’s important to work on this quality.
“You know, I’ve noticed that sometimes you are so strong and determined to get your own way, that you don’t consider the feelings of others. I would like to work with you on developing the skill of empathy and selflessness in your life. This is an important quality because it will help you relate to others and it will help you be a good friend.”
3). Let him know you’re really excited to work on this new skill with him and you are confident that they will make progress in this area.
“I’m really excited to work with you in this area and I can’t wait to see the progress you’re going to make.”
4). Whenever you see success in this area, affirm him, even if it’s minor progress!
“Wow, I noticed that you let your brother choose which TV show to watch this morning. That was showing kindness and putting others before yourself.”
5). Let him know how you see God working in his heart. Let him know you have confidence that God has a plan for their future.
“I know God is working in your heart and I am excited to see how he uses you in his plan.”
6). Affirm even minor improvements. Encourage “approximately” right behavior. Encourage small steps in the right direction. Don’t wait for perfection before you affirm him. Success breeds success. Allow him to see his success, even if it’s minor. This will give him hope that he can change.
“Last time you hit your brother when he took your toy, and this time you only screamed at him. That’s progress. Let’s keep working in this area. I’m really proud of you and I know you can do it.”
If you put these tips into practice on a regular basis, you will be surprised at the difference you’ll see in your son, after putting them into practice for a short time.
Go check your inbox right now for your first email from me. Be sure to check your “updates” folder. Then, right-click on the email from Laurie Christine, select “Move to Inbox,” then select “Do this for future emails from this sender.” That way you won’t miss out on any of the parenting tools I’ll be sending your way!
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Laurie Christine is a Certified Biblical Parenting Coach, trained by the National Center for Biblical Parenting (NCBP). All information covered in this series of emails is courtesy of the NCBP. For more information, check out the resources on their website, www.biblicalparenting.org
MEET LAURIE CHRISTINE
Laurie Christine is a certified Biblical Parenting Coach, author, podcast host, wife, and mom of four wild, loud, adventurous boys.
Her podcast, Redeeming the Chaos, invites moms of boys to join her in the wild, wonderful adventure of raising courageous boys and connecting them with Christ.
In addition to hosting a podcast, Laurie writes devotional Bible stories for families. As a mom of four young boys, she understands how important it is for parents to connect with their children, while communicating the truth of God’s Word to them in a way they can understand.
MORE RESOURCES
Check out these resources from the National Center for Biblical Parenting
Parenting is Heart Work
(Affiliate Link)
In this book you will learn:
* How to connect to your child’s heart to bring about change.
* Ways to correct that are more powerful and last longer.
* To help your child reign in emotions.
* How to use common, everyday activity to build life-skills.
* Biblical, practical tools that work.
PHW Training Manual
(Affiliate Link)
In this book, you will learn:
* How to develop strategic, biblical, practical routines of family life.
* How to give day-to-day instructions in a way that builds cooperation and responsibility.
* Practical ideas for connecting with your kids emotionally so that their hearts will be soft and teachable.
* How to integrate key success principles into your family.
Motivate Your Child
(Affiliate Link)
In this book you will learn:
* How to parent in ways that build internal motivation so that kids don’t have to rely on you to get things done.
* The four promptings of the conscience and how to coordinate your parenting to takeadvantage of them.
* Ways to energize your spiritual training with fun and creativity.
* How to help children respond to mistakes instead of blaming, defending, or justifying.
MYC Action Plan
(Affliate Link)
In this book, you will learn:
* A step-by-step guide to identify a specific problem and then define a character-based solution.
* How to craft a parenting plan tailored to your child’s unique gifts and needs.
When parents have defined plans, they move forward with more confidence, see changes more quickly, and experience hope as they grow in their relationship with their child.
COACHING
Are you interested in working with Laurie Christine in our eight week, one-on-one parent coaching program?